Scott Bateman is a funny guy untroubled by facts, which means he’s truly free. His latest book, Disalmanac (Penguin Group, 2013), is chock-full of useful words and graphics, like this one. Finally, we can point out something useful on a Washington State map. Also, I love the word “chock-full.” He’s one of those cool Salon guys who also has a blog that’s cooler than mine, makes movies and writes books, is attractive to all women, is a syndicated cartoon artist, publishes cool pictures of nuns fishing, and knows tons of famous people, like my most favorite band in the whole world, Low. He even knows a few real vampires. I hate him. And I love him. You can, too.